“It’s not my fault!”

This has been percolating in my brain for a couple weeks now, and I think I’m ready to write.

“It’s not my fault!”

I’ve heard these words repeatedly in my 30+ years of working with children.

Whether it’s due to someone getting hurt, something getting broken, or something being lost, these words are usually spoken vehemently, even while the conscience is telling us otherwise.

Why is it so hard for us to take ownership of our actions?

True, there are some things that happen that are out of our control. In those instances, it is NOT our fault.

But what about when my daughter said that it wasn’t her fault her phone was broken due to it constantly falling out of her pocket? Wasn’t she the one who PUT it in her pocket, knowing there’s a good chance it would eventually fall out and smash onto the ground? Yet, it’s not her fault. A classic example of not wanting to own the action that caused the trouble.

I’m not immune to this phenomenon. Every once in awhile I will think to myself, “It’s not MY fault that….”

Mmm… wait… yes, it is. I have at least part ownership to this. I need to figure out a different plan on how to deal with this.

I’m not perfect. But at least I’m aware of this problem. And I’m taking steps to change it, at least on my end.